Sole Survivor


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16th Apr 2014

Wednesday // 3pm // 3 months ago

Why I don’t need a relationship right now to make me happy (Cause I can do it myself)

Someone asked me a random question today that had made me ponder on some things… & I’d love to share it all to you.


I don’t need a man to make me happy right now, cause I know how to make myself happy without depending it to other people. I don’t need to be in a relationship just because everyone else is, cause I myself is still in a work in progress, with so much to fix & prioritize in my life that I won’t have time dealing with petty fights & random love quarrels. I don’t have someone special not because there’s no one to entertain, nor because I haven’t gotten over my past relationship but because I devote all my love & time to the boy who means the world to me, & he doesnt deserve to share it with someone else. Just because I’m not seeing someone, or dating, doesn’t mean I feel lonely like there’s a missing piece in the puzzle of my not so exciting life. No. I have actually never enjoyed being single as much as I do now. & I genuinely mean that.


It took me quite a while to appreciate happiness without the person whom you get it from. It took me a really long time to pick up the small little pieces & learn to smile again, till I made room to love myself more. A little bit more, a lot more, & more, till I never needed to rely to anyone else for love. It then made me realize that love is not what you give to someone else, or to the people around you. It starts with what you do for yourself, it starts with how you love & appreciate you being you, without others having control over what you feel.


I guess I shall never be chasing for a wrong man to stay in my life anymore, nor be looking for love just cause I need it. Cause I have it all over me, I have found happiness in so many form, in so many people, in things you don’t always see or appreciate, in the little things we tend to take for granted, & within myself whom I forgot to love when I was too focused of my love for my significant other.


Just because we are single, doesn’t mean we’re not happy. It just simply means that we are secured with ourselves, that with or without a man, we’ll be fine. Just fine. Perfectly fine. ;)

25th Mar 2014

Tuesday // 9am // 4 months ago

Day 04 - A picture of your night.

Since I missed to write on so many days already, please allow me to do 2 post today to be able to catch up on the 30 days tumblr challenge! 

This would normally how my ‘night’ & sometimes day looks like. I guess I will always be my son’s over sized & walking teddy bear because just like me, he really loves hugging & cuddling every time we spend time together. Clingy bee like his mommy! So right after I put my son to sleep at night, I would often read a book, watch my favorite series or doze off right away. Its just either of the three, really. 

25th Mar 2014

Tuesday // 3am // 4 months ago

Day 03 - A picture of the cast from your favorite show.

I’ve learned to love this series since the first day I watched it. It was love at first episode! & after so many years & 9 seasons, I could say that by far, it may not be the best but the series that I really really love the most. It shows the true meaning of friendship, love, & experience in which we grow, change & emancipates as we grow older. 

Tagged as: Onetreehill.

20th Mar 2014

Thursday // 2am // 4 months ago

Day 02 - A picture of you and the person you have been close with for the longest

I could not think of anyone who has been close to me for the longest time but her. As they would always say, our cousin is our first best friend! She has known me for as long as I’ve been in the world. From kiddie quarrels, to barbie dolls & polly pockets, ‘bahay-bahayan’, to swimming lessons, of first crushes & boyfriends, to prom & debuts, to seeing each other bloom into wonderful women & now that we’re almost in our mid twenties, she has constantly been a best friend to me! & not to mention the best ‘ninang’ for my son, too! Its just so much fun to grow old with someone that knows you so well that you know whatever happens, you’d always have them in your life & that they will never ever leave you.

If you ever get to read this, know that I’m beyond grateful for having been known by you for the longest time! We effortlessly love each other, & I’m looking forward to more decades of growing old with you! Love you to the moon & back! 

18th Mar 2014

Tuesday // 11pm // 4 months ago

Day 01 - A picture of yourself with 15 facts.

1. I’m a single mom to a cute little boy who’s turning 3 this year

2. I suck in driving 

3. I am surprisingly good in technical support & became a level 3 technician/ Broadband Specialist for a top Australian Tel Co

4. I really really want to be on radio & I  auditioned once for a junior jock position in a radio station when I was in high school (Apparently it was only open for college students)

5. I host weddings, debuts & other events on the side cause its something I enjoy doing the most

6. I am overweight & close enough to being obese huhuhu (Hopefully not)

7. I have studied in an all girl school for the longest time (Since Prep to HS, however I flunked 2 subjects on 3rd year so I moved to a different sch for my last year, then came college & was back in an all girl school again =|

8. I sing really really well ( Most of the people close to me know this hihi). I actually sing almost every where nyahaha

9. My cooking skills are above average (You have to try my chicken pastel, lengua, & seafood spag!)

10. I still watch disney channel daily (Not because of my kid but because I really like adventure time & phineas & ferb)

11. I used to make my own accessories (Back when it was still a hobby)

12. I was once a tibo

13. I don’t like wearing heels (I’d rather wear flats, doll shoes & sneakers)

14. I like everything about weddings & my dream job is to become a wedding coordinator/ events’ specialist

15. I like eating more than anything else in the world & I have to satisfy my taste buds every time my tummy complains of hunger!

18th Mar 2014

Tuesday // 10pm // 4 months ago

The 30 days tumblr challenge

I’m kind of looking for a reason to blog more & write my thoughts as often as I can… so I guess this might be a good idea. Hope I can finish the 30 days though! We’ll see how far I can go haha

Day 01 - A picture of yourself with 15 facts.
Day 02 - A picture of you and the person you have been close with for the longest.
Day 03 - A picture of the cast from your favorite show.
Day 04 - A picture of your night.
Day 05 - A picture of your favorite memory.
Day 06 - A picture of something on your mind.
Day 07 - A picture of your most treasured item.
Day 08 - A picture that makes you laugh.
Day 09 - A picture of the person who has gotten you through the most.
Day 10 - A picture of the person you do the most messed up things with.
Day 11 - A picture of something you hate.
Day 12 - A picture of something you love.
Day 13 - A picture of your favorite band or artist.
Day 14 - A picture of someone you could never imagine your life without.
Day 15 - A picture of something you want to do before you die.
Day 16 - A picture of someone who inspires you.
Day 17 - A picture of something that has made a huge impact on your life recently.
Day 18 - A picture of your biggest insecurity.
Day 19 - A picture of you when you were little.
Day 20 - A picture of somewhere you’d love to travel.
Day 21 - A picture of something you wish you could forget.
Day 22 - A picture of something you wish you were better at.
Day 23 - A picture of your favorite book.
Day 24 - A picture of something you wish you could do again.
Day 25 - A picture of your day.
Day 26 - A picture of something that means a lot to you.
Day 27 - A picture of yourself and a family member.
Day 28 - A picture of something you’re afraid of.
Day 29 - A picture that can always make you smile.
Day 30 - A picture of someone you miss.

13th Mar 2014

Thursday // 5am // 4 months ago

Of being jobless yet learning how to live

Today marks the 6th month since I have been jobless, & decided to fulfill my duties as a mom full time. You see, as a single mother to a 2 year old back then, it was one of the hardest decisions to make in my 22 years of existence. But given the circumstances I knew I had to give up not just on my job, but the opportunities of being close enough to my dream position, too. It was a sacrifice that I had to bear, to be able to attend to my 2 year old who was confined at the hospital that time. I could’ve taken a leave of absence, yes. But seeing my little one in that situation made me so guilty I knew I was ready to give up anything to be there for him again, & so I decided.

Six months after, I am now declaring bankruptcy. Yes, I am officially broke. My savings had all went down the drain. The grocery shopping for baby needs every two weeks, the unplanned boracay getaway with the family, the late night drinking sessions with friends whom I hadn’t seen for a long time, the constant visit to our favorite café for breakfast had got me nothing but a zero bank account.
But let me tell you something. In a span of six months, I was able to teach my little one to trace his ABC’s, memorize tons of nursery rhymes, & even send him to toddler school before next school year just so he wouldn’t have a hard time to adjust. I was able to teach him not just to pray ‘Angel of God’ every night, but also to recite the 5 mysteries of the holy rosary. I also noticed that when I started taking care of him full time, he stopped peeing in the bed, started eating lots of vegetables more, became a lot socially active, learned new words aside from ‘Kaon’ & got over his ‘bisaya’ accent that his nanny used to speak. I was also able to go back to an old hobby, which was hosting, through the help of old connections who still believed in my potential.


Do you want to know more? I was able to spend lots of time with my family too, after being absent in most occasions for the past year due to a different work schedule. We travelled & had out of town trips more than usual, enjoyed the sea, sun & sand. I was able to catch up on loss time with a lot of friends, from college & high school. Was able to finally know how it feels to get drunk again & not remember anything the next day, work out then have buffet for dinner, realize that partying in clubs are not for me anymore & that sleeping in with a popcorn & root beer while watching How I met your mother is definitely a better me time than to be out the whole night. I was able to cook again, & learn so many dishes using apps that are just one click away, thanks to the internet. I was able to meet new people too, at the gym while attending a group exercise, at the bookstore while doing a book haul, & at the grocery where you realize you’re not the only single mother who thinks that powdered milk is a little over priced.


I had so much time to do what I wanted to do, to just live each day at a time. Know how it feels to sleep in & wake up late without getting worried your boss might look for you, doing house hold duties again, & having more time for yourself. Looking back, six months ago, I don’t have regrets. It took me to lose my job for me to feel alive again, for me to appreciate the small things money can’t buy, & to be able to fulfill my duties not only as a mother, but as well as to myself.
Now that I only have roughly a week before I start working again, I can say that losing my job six months ago was a blessing in disguise. It was something that I needed, something God had given for a purpose, something that was really meant to happen. Looking back, I think it has been pretty worth it. As they say, in life you will win some, & lose some. But what matters is along the way, you’ll realize that God does every single thing in this world for a reason, maybe not now, but you will. Eventually.

sayingimages

09th Dec 2013

Monday // 7am // 7 months ago
sayingimages:

Follow Saying images for more great quotes

sayingimages:

Follow Saying images for more great quotes

clarexquisite

09th Dec 2013

Monday // 7am // 7 months ago
"I think you need to fall in love with the wrong person. I think you need to fight and cry and sweat and bleed and fail. I think you need to have bad relationships and bad breakups. I think you need all of that so that when the right person and the right relationship comes along you can sigh with relief and say, “Ah yes. That is how its supposed to feel."
— Excerpt from “Conversations with my Mother” (via clarexquisite)

(Source: speioritur)

beben-eleben

27th Nov 2013

Wednesday // 4am // 8 months ago

36 Things You Obviously Need In Your New Home

beben-eleben:

A Fire Pit IN THE POOL

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A Door That Turns into a Ping-Pong Table

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Chilled Produce Drawers in the Kitchen

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A Wine Cellar Trap Door

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 A Sleepover Room

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A Door Handle That Automatically Turns Off Electricity and Gas When You Leave

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A Swing-Set Dining Table

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A Built-In TV for the Bathtub

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A Glass-Encased Fireplace

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 A Loft Hammock

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A Hot Tub That Flows from the Inside to Outside

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A Huge Round Bedroom Window

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A Stained-Glass Door

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A Library Staircase/Slide

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A Bone-Shaped Pool for Your Dog

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